Reprogramming the RAS week 4
What are we programming our filters to focus on?
If we want to improve our wellbeing and re-programme our RAS, it’s important we do become aware of our routines, which forms our habits. Routine is something we repeat over and over, till eventually we do it and don’t even think about it. Now our brains are pretty clever, seriously capable of some pretty impressive stuff, however, when it comes to routines, we are in charge, we begin the process that leads to habits which can be helpful, or, not.
Most of us like to see some kind of reward for our efforts. This can be a feeling of calm, excitement, achievement, satiation and more. There are cues if you like, which we can respond to what we think will give us a reward.
This is how addictions or unhelpful habits can occur. Someone may get into the routine of a glass of wine at the end of the working day. This then becomes a bottle of wine. The person may realise this isn’t helpful, but it helps them unwind at the end of a hard day. They tell themselves they can stop anytime……. just not today……….
Someone playing the FOBT (Fixed Odd Betting Terminals), for fun, a bit of excitement, a chance to beat the odds. But they may find it’s not as much fun as it used to be and your losing more than your winning, but you will just play again today, you can stop anytime, just not today………. You have got into a routine of drinking wine, of using FOBT and this routine has become a habit and maybe not a very helpful one……….. If you find you have got into habits which are harming your health, please speak to someone, we all need help sometimes. Remember, you matter.
So how do we nurture healthy habits? Well one way to do this is find a new routine. So the cue maybe the same, a hard day at work, but instead of playing the FOBT or the glass of wine, you go for a walk, read a book, do something which offers you a sense of wellbeing which doesn’t risk your health, social life or pocket! Finding a healthy routine gives you that same sense of reward.
Now it maybe you are struggling with unhealthy habits and find it hard to stop, so you may need to have a wee chat with someone. Please do, as you matter. These blogs do not replace professional advice, they simply offers some new routines which you may find rewarding for your wellbeing and want to adopt.
We all have habits and routines and when the world is uncertain, we may find we cling to them even more intensely, as they don’t require us to think too much about change. We have enough to be dealing with! and our habits or routines are our escape. Unhelpful habits can develop when we don’t have a sense of achievement or enjoyment in our daily life, so we find an activity which in short term brings us this feeling of pleasure e.g. a glass of wine and a cigarette at the end of a busy day, or two as we feel we really have earned this. But in the long term can put our life and wellbeing out of balance.
Often, we defeat ourselves before we even start. Self-talk is the internal voice we all have which comments on our activities, our actions, our plans, and our dreams. It may be a kind supportive voice, telling you how great you are, or it can be a cruel critical voice which makes you feel small. It may even be a suspicious voice, which sees threats and enemies where none exist, and we listen to it, so much, we close ourselves off from people, believing no one cares or can be trusted.
Points for reflection
Capture some of the things you say to yourself which are not helpful
Capture some of the things you say to yourself which are helpful
If you found completing the first reflection box easier than the second, then learning to use a kinder inner voice is something which may help you in re-programming your RAS and regaining a sense of balance and wellbeing.
You may find watching this video ‘what are you saying to yourself because you are listening’ helpful. Becoming more aware of our self-talk and how to change our internal voice can go a long way to helping re-programme our RAS https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SEqa1u-i5MM
Our self-talk can also programme our internal filter, for example, if we keep saying, ‘’no one likes me’’ to ourselves, we will believe this. Our filter will look for evidence of this, we may become defensive, thinking every time someone doesn’t smile at us, they don’t like us. As opposed to person may just have been thinking about something else.
Also, remember, when our filter looks for one thing it can lock other things out, so the kind things the same person did you may not even see as you are convinced, they don’t like you. Our self-talk can also cause issues for us where we over personalise things so it really is important to pay attention to what you are saying to yourself and is it kind or helpful? Maybe we know what we need to do to get some balance back but this voice seeks to sabotage our efforts ….if we let it. Next time we will look at some simple steps to take which can help you have a kinder inner voice. Please remember you matter and become aware of what you are locking into, and what you are locking out…………..
Thanks for reading
Hilda